He pulls away from him, but only so he can brace his hands on either side of Lan Zhan's shoulders, his hair falling in a curtain around them. His wrist flexes against the ribbon tied snug around it; he feels sick, as if the words expelled some horrible acid as they left his mouth.
"No, I didn't mean it. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. That was a terrible thing to say, I don't know why I said it, I -- "
(It was just -- everything seemed far too real, far too close for an instant, and before he could stop himself he had to -- )
He cards his fingers through the hair just above Lan Zhan's temple. Tries to anchor himself: we are here. "I'm sorry," he whispers.
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He pulls away from him, but only so he can brace his hands on either side of Lan Zhan's shoulders, his hair falling in a curtain around them. His wrist flexes against the ribbon tied snug around it; he feels sick, as if the words expelled some horrible acid as they left his mouth.
"No, I didn't mean it. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. That was a terrible thing to say, I don't know why I said it, I -- "
(It was just -- everything seemed far too real, far too close for an instant, and before he could stop himself he had to -- )
He cards his fingers through the hair just above Lan Zhan's temple. Tries to anchor himself: we are here. "I'm sorry," he whispers.